How do I stop comparing myself to others?

How do I stop comparing myself to others?

Comparing yourself to others causes you to become insecure and anxious. It takes our joy and prevents us from giving our best in life. If you are constantly checking out people on various social media platforms, then the chances of feeling inadequate keep increasing.

It is okay to compare your life with others,but when it becomes anobsession,then it becomes dangerous. This is because with time you tend to compare your deficiencies to others strengths; this creates a distorted view of life.

There is always someone who is doing better then you, whose more beautiful and if you keep using them as a standard to live your life, you will find yourself constantly depressed. But, how can you overcome your need to compare your life with others?

Embrace your past

We all have a past that acts as a constant reminder of the mistakes that we have done. But, instead of it becoming a reference point for self-criticism take it as a learning curve. Embrace who you are and find it in your heart to forgive yourself. Focus more on your achievements than on your failures.

Detox from social media

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While there are benefits to using social media it has nowadays become a tool where people compare their lives. Everyday we are bombarded with photos of the perfect couple, Luxury travels to exotic destinations, and all the materialism that money can buy. This can leave one feeling dissatisfied with their lives. If you are always comparing yourself with others online, it could be time you took a break from social media. Self-doubt can lead to Adderall addiction, as the victim engages in substance abuse as a coping mechanism.

Source for comparison

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It is essential that you check your behavior and thoughts to find your source of comparison. There could be thinking patterns that are ingrained deep in your subconscious that you may not even be aware of. Once you notice the underlying pattern, you can look for someone to help you break it. Constantly comparing yourself to others is directly related to your self-esteem. Self-esteem is how you view yourself. It can either be positive or negative. One sign that your self-esteem is at the mercy of others is when you look up to others to validate you.

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Journal your thoughts

At times we admire positives from people we envy. Positive comparisons help you become a better person,but you should learn to accept people as a whole,i.e., understand that even people you envy have both positives and negatives. Focusing only on their positives gives you a distorted view of life. It is important to journal any negative thoughts that you feel when you are engaged in comparisons. Ask yourself for example, do you feel sad, lonely when you see couples holding hands. While it is true that you are single now, this condition will not remain the same.

Be Content with what you have

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If you are constantly comparing yourself with others, then it is time you practiced gratitude. Remember that there is someone who is worse off than you. Once you start appreciating what you have, you will start feeling better about yourself. You can also go the extra mile by getting yourself a gratitude journal. Write some of the things that are positive in your life and be grateful for them. Meditate on some of the good things that have happened in your life through the year. Are there friends who have always supported you through life? This is the right time to call them with a message of gratitude.


Helping someone else who is in need helps shift the focus from you to another person. You do not realize how much you have until you find some who is struggling to get one meal a day or who does not have clothes and shoes. You can always find a task that you can volunteer in from your church or neighborhood. Volunteering can take the form of donating old clothes, cleaning the streets of garbage, cooking for the homeless and elderly. Look for something that will make you feel appreciated.

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Make goals

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It is important that you find a quiet place and write down your lifetime goals. Once you accomplish a goal tick it as complete. With time you will find yourself living a more fulfilled life. Goal setting is not something that only takes place during the beginning of the year. You can do it at any point in your life. Break down your goals into small manageable goals. If you are not comfortable with your weight take action and join the gym. Write down the pounds you want to lose within the year, then break down the weights into months.

Progress not perfection

Stop trying to be perfect. At any given point of your life, there is always going to be something that you do not like about yourself or someone who is doing better than you. The aim is to enjoy your journey where you are knowing that you are making progress. As you accomplish your small goals you will find yourself making larges steps. Accepting your flaws, imperfections, and mistakes is a process. When you embrace who you are, you are better able to make better decisions. Make yourself an ally instead of a critic.

Compare yourself with you

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One advantage of making personal goals is that you compare yourself against personal goals instead of looking outwards. Since you can measure your progress, you can gauge how well you are doing. Take yourself for treats once you accomplish a goal. You can only be the best version of you, not of another person.


Comparing yourself to others is one way to become depressed and sad. It takes power from you to others. You are also not able to focus on personal development because your focus is outward. Once you learn how to appreciate who you are and what you have, you can start leaving a more fulfilled life. The grass is also not as green as it looks on the other side; focus on watering your own.

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